Here are some wisecracks to use in the futuristic hell scape.

How many pollocks does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. There are no more light bulbs or Poland.

What do you get when you cross a hooker and a poodle?
A horrible mutant.

What did the sailor say when he saw the world eradicated by nuclear bombs?
“Thar she blows!”

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