I just found out my beard has cancer which means the rest of me is going to fall off.
The other day I saw a street performer but he was just sitting there, not playing any music. I went up, put a dollar in his guitar case and said, “keep up the good work.”
Michael Jackson was the Howard Hughes of his generation, an eccentric millionaire isolated by success.
New iPhone better than old iPhone
Guinness record set by fattest man ‘alive’
Wimbledon tournament gentlemanly display of good sportsmanship
No one admits to being a hipster for the same reason no refers to himself as a douche bag.
“I like you, but as a friend” “A friend with benefits?” “Um probably not.” “Well how about just the benefits?”
Friendship is a strange thing. As I see it, life’s a competition to obtain the most prizes which means that anyone else should be thwarted at every available opportunity.
There’s a reason therapists charge by the hour instead of using performance based pay, they’d die of starvation.
Does it break the restraining order if you’re looking at them through a telescope? I am going to make the coolest doll from this hair I pulled out of the drain. Finally found out where that cute barista lives. Going out for a jog if posted at 2am A boy just sat next to me [...]
They say obesity is the new smoking but I’ll bet they have a hard time banning it from restaurants.
Video games are teaching children that violence is OK, which really takes the burden off military recruiters.
Reality is a subset of modern living. It’s something one has the option of entering when bored with fantasy.
The Best of Boredom podcast has been discontinued. Thanks to our listeners for your support.