My transgendered friend came out from her operation and I yelled, “It’s a girl!”
I came up with an alternative ending to the 6th sense: that little boy was crazy all along.
-Toyota executive to commit ritual suicide by driving Toyota made car
-Chilean government condemns future acts of homosexuality by trapped miners
People sometimes wonder about the mechanics of gay marriage, “who will change their last name?” It’s different, of course, for lesbians and gay men. With lesbians each will keep their so-called maiden name and at the most add a hyphen. With gay men, they will trade last names.
I wish baseball had a fifth base because then we’d have a cute way of talking about anal sex.
I was writing in my notebook at a party full of pretentious hipsters when someone walked up and said, “what do you think you’re better than everyone here?” I told him, “of course I think I’m better than everyone here. That’s exactly why I fit in.”
There’s a subtle distinction between going to a concert and yelling out, “play another one” versus yelling, “play a different one.”
I gave my two week’s notice at work. There’s no joke but I’m still laughing.
My chiropractor told me I have to stop using air quotes when I call him “doctor.”
You only have to tell him once. He is able to open his mouth wide enough to fit a basketball. You don’t have to take him to Disneyland to see his face light up.