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My life if it were reinterpreted by famous movies

Instead of shrimp waiter I am pet detective

Instead of shrimp waiter I am legend

I spend winter trapped in empty hotel with wife and stepson but merely fail to write novel

Shark in ocean causes me to write funny joke about people being eaten by sharks

Lose friend during wild bachelor party, never speak of it again

I comply with instructions not to feed gremlins after midnight by not feeding gremlins at all

Use evil ring of invisibility to start voyeur porn site

Daughter becomes possessed by devil, she is institutionalized for life

Son claims to see dead people, he is enrolled in montessori school for creative children

I have sex with Hermoine but still fail her in potions class

I travel back in time to kill savior of humanity but instead become shrimp waiter

Samuel L Jackson’s speech on sharks interrupted by me eating him

3 Comments

  1. shady3011@yahoo.com wrote:

    But I dreamed about you and you were a shrimp delivery person.

    Thursday, September 23, 2010 at 10:43 pm | Permalink
  2. Miles K wrote:

    what’s that from?

    Friday, September 24, 2010 at 8:49 am | Permalink
  3. shady3011@yahoo.com wrote:

    I wasn’t quoting anything really, I just had a dream.

    But, maybe it is accidentally also from Spongebob?

    Wednesday, September 29, 2010 at 10:32 pm | Permalink

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