A friend of mine needs jokes to roast Portland. Here are a few I wrote for him:
Portland’s top import is Netflix. Portland’s top export is Netflix return envelopes.
Portland wishes it was half as gay as San Francisco.
The mayor of Portland is a tree.
“Portland is so Seattle-”
“How Seattle is it?”
When people in Portland talk about their black friend they’re all talking about the same guy.
Portland is the headquarters for the organization “People for the Ethical Treatment of Sewage.”
Portland has a large number of microbreweries, micro-distilleries and micropenises.
In case of emergency, the city of Portland can be conveniently forgotten about.
Portland is at such a lack for racial diversity that even Asians won’t move there.