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Tag Archives: dating

The algorithms of online dating seem like the step right before something truly ominous.

I met my girlfriend online. She lied about her age of course, “Oh I’m thirteen,” she said.

A lot of people try and use the internet to help their love lives. No reason the cause of your isolation can’t be the cure, right?

I’m a comedian which means I date the women sick of dating musicians.

“No means no,” is either dating advice or the world’s shortest Spanish lesson.

“Tired of online dating? You’re not alone.” Yes you are. That’s why you’re dating online.

In this era, everyone considers himself a Casanova when, in fact, your average male is barely capable of landing one good woman throughout his entire life.

If I dated only white girls no one would say I have a fetish but you date two Asian women and suddenly you have yellow fever.

I tried speed dating but I liked the speed more than the dating.

My Lonely Friend

Mike made artisanal chapstick on his secluded bee ranch up in the Sierra Mountains. He claimed that bees at higher elevations produced a subtler, breezier wax.

“I like you, but as a friend” “A friend with benefits?” “Um probably not.” “Well how about just the benefits?”

I want to start a dating site for stalkers where all the women who are on the site don’t realize it.