There’s a fine line between house sitting and breaking into someone’s home while they’re on vacation and eating all their food.

I dislike Pinata’s because they encourage violence and gluttony in children. So every time I see kids playing with a Pinata I tell them a story. “That Pinata ate too much candy, and now it has to be punished.” And then afterward, I make them bury its corpse.

As a waiter I do not grow food, I do not cook food, I only suggest food and then bring whatever a customer picks. I am, essentially, a food consultant.