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Tag Archives: marriage

Why don’t we have doublewide coffins for dead married people?

“I hate the internet.” “Then why don’t you marry it?”

Children tend to get kidnapped for ransom over spouses because criminals don’t want to gamble on the strength of marriages.

Instead of posting my wedding photos on Facebook I just want to do the whole thing there.

my views on marriage in graph form

The international symbol for marriage is a white flag.

A failed marriage ends in a divorce. A successful marriage ends in the death of one or both parties.

A Typical Day

“First things first,” I always say. I say it all the time and no one ever disagrees. This is because I’m the boss around here and if people disagree with me I fire their asses. One time, I had a sandwich that didn’t agree with me so I fired that too. Some people beg me [...]

Cowboys have big belt buckles so as to better beat their wives and children.

If your first time is on your wedding night, with someone you truly love then there’s a good chance that your last time will be with someone you really hate and both will be with the same person.

Men withhold affection from their wives only to weep in front of whores.