Wednesday, January 4, 2012
At the University of Phoenix you don’t get a diploma they just frame a copy of your receipt.
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
When you finish your degree at University of Phoenix you don’t get a diploma you get a framed copy of the receipt.
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
My friend is broke but calls himself “financially unorganized.” Must be hard to get that big pile of nothing in order.
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
I’ve been selling old newspapers by calling them “vintage.”
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
My phone bill reads, “Printed on recyclable paper.” Not ‘recycled’ but ‘recyclable’. It’s like they already know I’m going to throw it out.
There’s a reason therapists charge by the hour instead of using performance based pay, they’d die of starvation.
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
By the time you can afford a high definition television you no longer have the high definition eyesight necessary to enjoy it.
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
My integrity is not for sale and won’t be until it can fetch a better price.
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
When it comes to money I have nothing to worry about. Absolutely nothing.
Pop music gives meaning to our lives in the same way gold paint adds value to a chair.
A penny saved puts you far above the average American’s credit to debt ration.
A new car loses 1/3 of its value when you drive it off the lot and 1/2 it’s appeal by the time you get it home.