I want to make an ad campaign for adult diapers that is so terrifying it causes people to crap their pants. Then they’ll really wish they’d been wearing my diapers.
By the time you can afford a high definition television you no longer have the high definition eyesight necessary to enjoy it.
If you want to kidnap an old man don’t bother to tie him up, just make him sit down in a beanbag chair. He’ll never escape.
Dead men tell no tales, but old men really pick up the slack in that department.