http://cleverthingstosay.com by Miles K Wed, 08 Feb 2012 07:13:14 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 http://cleverthingstosay.com/2011/01/19/1785/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=1785 http://cleverthingstosay.com/2011/01/19/1785/#comments Wed, 19 Jan 2011 17:42:04 +0000 admin http://www.cleverthingstosay.com/?p=1785 A lot of people like lemon flavored Bacardi but I like Bacardi flavored vomit.

]]> http://cleverthingstosay.com/2011/01/19/1785/feed/ 0 http://cleverthingstosay.com/2010/08/18/1440/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=1440 http://cleverthingstosay.com/2010/08/18/1440/#comments Wed, 18 Aug 2010 17:20:37 +0000 admin http://www.cleverthingstosay.com/?p=1440 I was writing in my notebook at a party full of pretentious hipsters when someone walked up and said, “what do you think you’re better than everyone here?” I told him, “of course I think I’m better than everyone here. That’s exactly why I fit in.”

]]> http://cleverthingstosay.com/2010/08/18/1440/feed/ 0 http://cleverthingstosay.com/2010/02/03/884/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=884 http://cleverthingstosay.com/2010/02/03/884/#comments Wed, 03 Feb 2010 16:55:51 +0000 admin http://www.cleverthingstosay.com/?p=884 Now that I’ve stopped drinking I don’t have much to look forward to but I have a lot more to look back on.

]]> http://cleverthingstosay.com/2010/02/03/884/feed/ 0 http://cleverthingstosay.com/2010/01/01/777/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=777 http://cleverthingstosay.com/2010/01/01/777/#comments Fri, 01 Jan 2010 13:00:49 +0000 admin http://www.cleverthingstosay.com/?p=777 Everyone knows the best way to start a New Year is with a brutal hangover.

]]> http://cleverthingstosay.com/2010/01/01/777/feed/ 0 http://cleverthingstosay.com/2009/12/31/plans-for-new-years/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=plans-for-new-years http://cleverthingstosay.com/2009/12/31/plans-for-new-years/#comments Thu, 31 Dec 2009 13:00:36 +0000 admin http://www.cleverthingstosay.com/?p=773 In the last few days I’ve been asking people about their plans for New Year’s Eve. So I wrote down some of the more popular and interesting responses.

1. Get drunk
2. Get wasted
3. Get drunk and wasted
4. Make up for entire year’s worth of disappointing parties
5. Rape
6. Anxiously host new Year’s party and pray friends come through with the drugs
7. Finish New Year’s resolutions list
8. Snort as much cocaine as possible before New Year’s resolutions list kicks in
9. Surf the internet through tears
10. Avoid ex-boyfriend
11. Hook up with ex-girlfriend
12. Count backwards and scream in unison
13. Vomit in acceptable location
14. Urinate in hilarious location
15. Drive safely while drunk, which means wearing an eye patch to compensate for double vision

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