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Tag Archives: politics

If you take a militant approach expect a militant response.

If conservatives initiated a War on Poverty it would probably involve real guns.

I think it’s just now becoming safe to admit that I didn’t vote.

Finally got around to registering as a sex offender.

If I were a cartoonist during the 1908 election I would hand in a blank piece of paper and say, “It is too small to draw Howard Taft.”

Do you know why I think Obama will be re-elected? Because people are afraid of change.

Third Party Presidential Candidates

Co-written with Alison Stevenson Sure we’d all like a voice in government but influencing one of the two major candidates can cost a fortune. But wait, off brand third party candidates can be bought at a fraction of the cost and there’s so many more to choose from. That’s why we bring you a list [...]

When you vote for the Green Party you don’t throw your vote away, you compost it.

Some people say that Obama didn’t do the things he “really” wanted to do in his first term so that he could get re-elected but if he had then he wouldn’t need to get re-elected.

The Republican Party wants to know if I’m better off than I was four years ago. I’m not. But, according to them, isn’t that my own damn fault anyway?

7 Fast Facts About Paul Ryan

co-written with Jesse Elias, originally published at ebaums world Paul Ryan (or Ryan Paul, as he is known to gym teachers) is Mitt Romney’s vice presidential pick. But who is he really? Using the latest internet technology we have begun to uncover some interesting facts you may not know about the guy:  1. Paul Ryan [...]

The Democrats are like the Washington Generals of politics.

North Korea at the Olympics

originally published at http://www.ebaumsworld.com North Korea, the world’s last stronghold of hard line communism, has been grabbing a lot of gold in the 2012 Olympics. The stakes are high for the athletes: winners will be generously rewarded when they return home, while losers would be best advised to seek political asylum.

Government inefficiency is making Judge, Jury and Executioner three separate jobs.

Manarchism: an egalitarian society composed entirely of bros.

Obama Joke

Recent Entries from Dick Cheney’s Diary (originally printed in Savage Henry Magazine)

On March 24th former Vice-President Dick Cheney received a heart transplant. March 24th, 2012 I got my new heart today. When the doctor showed it to me I snatched it out of his hand. They had to get four orderlies to pin my arms down before they got it back. Then the doctor explained that [...]

Ron Paul for Batman.

I don’t even know how some people in SF lift their hands out of bed every morning considering how heavy they are.  

Dicky Cheney was given a new heart today. Doctors had to first explain to him, “you don’t have to eat this heart in order to gain its power.”