You ever feel sad and lonely and then Netflix recommends, “Friends?”
3D printers can make just about anything, but they can’t make love.
In the future, the sound of a heart rate monitor flatlining will be replaced with AOL’s “Goodbye” tone.
I’ve been going through people’s facebook photo albums of their trips to India in an attempt to find myself.
I’m done browsing the internet. I think I’m ready to buy it.
If you went back twenty years ago and told people we spend all of our time looking at our phones they would think we’re idiots.
As a Halloween prank, let’s go on Amazon.com and buy apples and razorblades. That way when people buy Apples it will say, “People who bought this also bought razorblades.”
The only flaw of the new iPhone: you can’t use it to take a picture of your new iPhone.
Did you know that with a single Kindle you could hold a book burning of the entire western cannon?
I just converted all my jpegs to Islam.
People worry about the death of the novel because the only things set to replace it are Facebook and Twitter.
Sure my grandfather isn’t computer literate but then again my kids probably won’t be regular literate.
The algorithms of online dating seem like the step right before something truly ominous.
I want to automate the thought process.
“What will they think of next?” “Probably more ways to kill people.”
I’ve been giving my iPod only organic electricity so that it grows up to be a big healthy iPad.
A lot of people try and use the internet to help their love lives. No reason the cause of your isolation can’t be the cure, right?
The sexuality of today’s young people is fertilized in pornography. It’s intimidating for the boys, who worry, “if I’m going to lose my virginity I don’t need to just find a girl to sleep but two other guys to fuck her as well.”
The only way I’d win an iPad is if someone else lost an iPad
People used to get excited about the arrival of the mail each day; now they can get excited about it all day.