“Do you think my life would make a good movie?” “Is your name Spiderman? No? Then probably not.”
“My boyfriend has a feminine side.” “Is it the inside? Because that’s where my penis would go.”
A woman once accused me of “intimacy issues.” I replied, “what’re you kidding? I’m being intimate with plenty of women.”
When you study philosophy in college people always ask “what kind of a job will you get with that?” But in this economy I have a ready reply which is, “Same thing as you. Nothing.”
I remember it differently. As I recall, I was the one who took no pleasure from the act.
I’m not perfect. There are things about me that could be more perfect.
Once I was trying to pick up a girl at a party when she told me she was a lesbian, “I fuck other women” she said. “I’ll believe it when I see it” I replied.